


Wake

by JustAnotherMadOne



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
Genre: Body Horror, Grief/Mourning, Horror, M/M, Psychological Horror, Self-Harm, Stranded
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-20
Updated: 2015-11-26
Packaged: 2018-03-13 23:43:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3400568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherMadOne/pseuds/JustAnotherMadOne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While passing through a dangerous star system, Tailgate is knocked out... and wakes to find he is the only survivor of a deadly radiation storm...</p>
<p>How can he escape the monsters born from his crewmates?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Crash

** Chapter 1  
Crash **

> “I feel the black reaching out  
>  I hear its song without a doubt  
>  I still hear and I still see  
>  That you can't take the sky from me.”  
>  -‘The Ballad of Serenity’ by Sonny Rhodes and Joss Whedon

 It was a relatively normal day on the Lost Light.

 Ratchet and First Aid were holed up in the Medbay, no doubt making sure all their patients were in top working order.

 Whirl and Perceptor were shooting down targets in the firing range, bickering over who the best shot was.

 Ultra Magnus was making calls from his office, demanding that all the necessary reports were in and properly written and punctuated.

 Rung was talking to Skids over energon sweets and tea, with Skids making a few badly disguised innuendos, which still made the psychiatrist smile a little.

 Nightbeat and Nautica were debating over a story they had read and the possible philosophical implications, as well as what all the characters intended to do.

 Swerve was serving drinks at his bar, music blaring and everyone talking loudly and cheerfully. A large chunk of the crew were in here; Rodimus, Chromedome, Brainstorm, Getaway, Cyclonus…

 And Tailgate.

 The white minibot sat in one corner of the bar, sipping his engex through a curly straw (which Swerve had bought en masse) and keeping an optic out at everyone else in the bar. He had already seen Getaway try and do his odd ‘bomp’ ritual with Rodimus and Brainstorm being scolded for  
bringing his briefcase, but that wasn’t what he was entirely interested in.

 It was Cyclonus he was keeping an optic out for.

 It still flustered the small mech to think about how they were Conjunx Endura, even if it had only been for two months. No one had expected it to happen and even Tailgate was still unsure of how it happened. But he couldn’t be happier nonetheless.

 “Tailgate.”

 He looked up and saw the purple mech approaching, a cube of engex in his hand.

 He smiled. “Hey Cyclonus!” He greeted, his hands starting to shake with nervous energy. “What’s going on?”

 Cyclonus grunted as he sat down in front of Tailgate. “Not much of any value or interest.” He said simply, his voice still holding that unique yet sullen bite. “Earlier, Whirl was prying into our relationship when he has no business to.”

 “It couldn’t have been that bad.” Tailgate said, his visor lighting up a little brighter. “I think we could be a bit more open about this. What was he asking?” He took a sip of his drink.

 “He asked, and I quote; ‘So, have you fragged Tailgate into the berth yet?’”

 Tailgate spat out his drink.

 The purple mech’s lip plates twitched into an almost unperceivable smirk, pulling a cloth from his subspace and wiping up the mess made. “There you go.”

 The minibot coughed a few times before trying to speak again. “Okay… point taken.” He said, patting his chest. “Okay, I see what the issue was there.”

 The two started a conversation, even if it was mainly Tailgate talking and Cyclonus listening, sipping their drinks and simply letting the ruckus of the bar around them fade out, just the two of them sharing this beautiful calm and bizarre serenity between them.

 KZZT!

 ‘Attention Autobots, Decepticons and Neutrals. This is Megatron speaking.’

 The music and chatter stopped as the announcement continued.

 ‘We will soon be approaching the Aurelia Thirteen system, which is infamous for radiation storms and asteroid fields. I thereby order all Lost Light crew members to return to their quarters immediately and remain until we are safely out of the sector. However, the following bots, must meet at the deck; Rodimus, Ultra Magnus, Perceptor, Nautica and Ratchet. That is all.’

 The room suddenly filled with noise as bots starting to leave the bar.

 “Alright guys! Get back to your rooms and we’ll open up tomorrow!” Swerved called out, ushering out the bots present. “So, swig back what you got and get going, unless we incur the joy of bucket head Megatron!”

 Cyclonus grunted and stood up, Tailgate following in his stead. “Cyclonus?” The minibot asked. “What’s going on exactly?”

 The larger mech didn’t say anything, instead just starting to leave the bar. That was one of the most annoying things about Cyclonus, but Tailgate could (Just about) put up with it. Still didn’t exactly excuse not answering his question.

 The minibot sighed and instead followed Cyclonus, swimming through the crowded pack of bots leaving the bar. He just made it to the purple mech and, without even asking, took hold of his hand.

 “Tailgate.” The seeker finally said. “What are you doing?”

 “Don’t want to get crushed.” Tailgate murmured, looking to his Conjunx.

 Cyclonus looked like he was about to protest, only to hum quietly. “Fine.” He said simply.

 That was enough for Tailgate, leaving him to hold onto the larger mech’s hand. They continued the walk back to their quarters, the crowd slowly thinning as the crew went back to their quarters or to the deck.

 The two mechs passed by a window, prompting Tailgate to stop for a moment and let go of Cyclonus’ hand. He walked over and looked outside.

 “Wow…” He gasped. “It’s… beautiful…”

 The system they were approaching was filled with a symphony of colours; pink, green, red, purple, yellow and blue all blending into one glorious nebula. He could see stars glimmering in the distance and luminescent asteroids floating peacefully. Tailgate had never seen something as beautiful as this before in his entire life. The light reflected through the colours and almost seemed to create more shimmering shades that he had never even thought of in all of his short, yet eventful life. If anything, the sight soothed his spark and his processor.

 It seemed so majestic, but if what Megatron said was true, then it could have been just as dangerous.

 “Cyclonus, this is an amazing view, isn’t it? I don’t think I’ll ever be able to see something like this ever again.” He said, still looking out of the window. “But… I know you’ve seen something like this before sometime, Cy… clonus?”

 The minibot turned to find that the hallway was empty.

 The only sound that responded were the distant closing of doors, no doubt from everyone going back to their quarters.

 No Cyclonus in sight.

 “Oh.” Tailgate said simply, looking out the window one last time before making a move. He started to walk away, heading back to his shared quarters.

 Then again, it was partially his fault, since he could have just as easily asked Cyclonus to wait for him, but he just HAD to stay behind and look at where they were… Oh well, he could talk to him about it later.

 The walk was uneventful as everyone had disappeared and the engines were the only noise made, whirring in time with the minibot’s steps. He turned left and continued, the directions to his shared quarters ingrained into his processor.

 Almost there…

 Tailgate was just a few steps away from their hab suite, poised to enter the door code that was the only obstacle between him and Cyclonus…

 The lights turned red.

 The minibot panicked, pressing at the padlock over and over, only to receive a loud buzz and ‘ACCESS DENIED’ to flash before him. The alarms sounded, the noise piercing the air.

 ‘Attention Crew! A powerful radiation storm is coming this way, so we have no choice but to lock down all hab suites until further notice.’

 Oh no.

 No no no no…

 Tailgate slammed his fists against the door. “Cyclonus! Let me in!” He cried out, hitting the door harder. “Please Cyclonus! Let me in, LET ME IN!”

 “Tailgate!” a muffled reply came, the door budging slightly, but not opening it. “The door’s locked, you fool!”

 “I don’t CARE!” The minibot cried out. “CYCLONUS, HELP ME! PLEASE, HELP M--!”

 Tailgate cried out as the ship lurched suddenly, his head smacking against the door. His hand flew to his forehelm, only for him to be tossed aside again as the ship was rocked. Before he could gain a foothold, his whole world tipped, forcing him to tumble down the hallway.

 Tailgate grabbed hold of one of the doors he slid by and tried to haul himself up off the floor, crying out as he was tossed to and fro but held on as tight as he could. “Cyclonus!” He cried out, trying to get back to his quarters and hopefully be able to ride out this storm and, maybe if luck was willing, get back into his quarters.

 No.

 Tailgate looked to his right, his sense of time freezing for a moment when it registered.

 A vibrant cloud of red was racing towards him, crackling with energy and not slowing down for even a moment. The minibot cried out and ran away from it, forcing his legs to go faster, faster, faster… He needed to get away no matter what! That cloud could hurt him terribly. Run faster! Run, RUN!

 Futile.

 Tailgate screamed as something slammed into his back, propelling him forward and smashing him into the wall. Errors popped up in his HUD, warning him of haywire circuitry and the dents in his helm and chest. He slid to the floor like a broken doll, trying to see through the gaggle of static that blurred his vision. The screaming of the alarms and the rumbling of the storm outside dulled to a vague rumble, and a new sound barely registered and a violet blob came closer.

 “Cy-cy-cy-cy-Clonus-s-s-s…” Tailgate whimpered as his vision faded to black. “H-H-Help… m-m-m-m-m-m-me…”

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys were expecting something else? OOPS.
> 
> Sorry, but new project made me distracted. XD
> 
> So, here's my first major foray into MTMTE fan fiction and hopefully, this will be pretty good. :)
> 
> Song this chapter: www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPwkDF…


	2. Lost Memory

** Chapter 2  
Lost Memory **

> ‘Please recall my heart, please recall my love, please come back.  
> Thinking of yourself made us distant.  
> Since that day, at that moment, when I dreamed of a flower  
> I could not stop thinking of you.  
> Please remember, please remind yourself,  
> I was more sad than you thought.  
> I’ll be waiting for you.’  
> -‘ME!ME!ME!’ – daoko feat. TeddyLoid

 Tailgate whimpered as his processor struggled to boot up. His vision still crackled and fizzed as he tried to get his thoughts together, his helm and body aching numbly. What had happened?

 Storm…

 Crash…

 Locked out…

 Cyclonus…

 The minibot’s vision finally cleared slightly, allowing him to get a better view of where he was. He was still where he had been when he fell unconscious, but it was far from the same…

 From what he could see, the lights were out and the hallway was far filthier than it had been. Mysterious stains and scratches littered the surfaces, some of the doors were either closed or missing, but the nearby window was murky and had a thin crack across it. There was no sound, save for the venting of the minibot.

 Tailgate whimpered again and tried to get up, his limbs feeling heavy and numb as if filled with sand. His HUD flashed warnings and alerts, telling him what was wrong… but one of the pieces of info confused him.

 No external injuries?

 How was that possible?

 But what concerned him most was the note appearing telling him that something was wrong, so he wouldn’t be able to transform; he may not have done that much, but it still troubled him.

 The white mech tried again, flexing his fingers and trying to twitch his legs until they felt more functional. Tentatively, he placed a hand on the ground, then another and pushed himself up. He cried out as pain shot up and down his limbs, but pushed on.

 He kept on pushing and forced his legs to join in, his frame trembling until he managed to haul himself to his aching pedes. “What… happened…?” He asked quietly, his vocaliser somehow healed as well. “This… isn’t making sense…”

 He looked to the filthy window and limped over, hoping that he would get a clue about where he – and the ship - was right now. He wiped off the detritus and muck off the glass and gasped.

 “We’re… still in Aurelia Thirteen?”

 True to his word, the minibot was greeted with that same beautiful cloud, but instead of the swirl of colours he remembered, it was all a sickly green missed with dashes of blue, the asteroids a blue so dark, it neared onyx. A small chunk of rock swam past, as if unaware of what had   
happened.

 Tailgate trembled and pulled away from the window, the sight no longer filling him with awe, but rather a harsh sense of dread, one that lanced at his spark painfully.

 Tailgate looked to his right, wondering just where everyone was. “Hello…?” He called out, an echo his only response. “Hello?”

 A sudden noise brought the minibot out of his thoughts.

 Crying.

 The white mech thought over what to do, two main options coming up; either go and see where the noise was coming from, or avoid it. On the one hand, it would give him a clue on what happened and if there was anyone who could help him. But, what if it was trap and something was waiting to attack him?

 The bot considered both options, wondering what to do next. He sighed and made his decision, walking to his right slowly, hoping to find where the crying was coming from…

 And who – or what – was making the noise.

* * *

 Tailgate was shivering by the time he entered the third room he assumed the noise was coming from. The noise had only become louder and more desperate, the sound scratching and clawing at Tailgate’s audials. The rooms he had been in were empty, but each room seemed to have shown signs of someone being in them, but the scratches and stains told him that something may have happened.

 “Hello!” He called out again, leaving the room and trying to still his shaking armour plating. His steps were cautious and fearful, slowly approaching the next room to investigate, finding that the door was open just a tiny crack. The sobbing spilled past the metal.

 Tailgate sighed and grabbed hold of the edge of the door, pulling with all the strength he had. The warped metal was stubborn, barely budging under the minibot’s grasp. “C’mon…!” He grunted, pulling harder and resorting to resting his left pede on the doorframe to give him some leverage. “Pull! Open up, DARN YOU!”

 The metal and the minibot shrieked as the door gave way, opening it up but also forcing the mech to the floor, smacking his faceplates against the grimy floor. He grumbled and pushed himself up again, before daring to tip-toe inside the room.

 A single, flickering light dangled helplessly from the ceiling, illuminating the wreckage left in the room; berth, desk and anything else broken down and famaged beyond any real use. However, it was the crying mech curled up in the corner, facing away from Tailgate that got his attention.

 “Chromedome?”

 The mech didn’t respond, his sobs continuing.

 Tailgate took a step forward. Two. Three. “Chromedome…” He said again, noticing that the crying had softened. “Um… what’s wrong…?”

 The yellow mech remained silent before one word split the silence.

 “…Rewind?”

 Before Tailgate could question that, Chromedome slowly stood up. His movements were shambling and badly co-ordinated, hauling himself up slowly. Tailgate trembled harder when the mech got to his feet, allowing a glimpse of the back of his neck… horribly mutilated and rusted, the bumpy wound stained black. “Rewind…” The mech croaked out, slowly turning. “I… missed you…”

 The sight made Tailgate squeal.

 A rusted hole rested where Chromedome’s spark should have been, black trails pouring down from the wound and down his heavily scratched legs. His mnemosurgery needles were out and seemed to be rusted and encrusted with a dried fluid. But it was the mech’s face that made the minibot start panicking. His visor was cracked and flickering, black tear tracks carved down his cheekplates and his mask was gone, revealing cracked and scarred lips.

 The mech laughed sadly. “I… I knew you couldn’t be dead…” He cooed, taking a few shambling steps forward. “I never… ever… wanted to lose you… thank Primus you’re here…”

 Tailgate took a step back. “Um, Chromedome…?” He started, unsure of what to do next. “I… I’m not Rewind… It’s me… Tailgate? You know ‘Panicky Guy with the Legs’?” He laughed uneasily, dread spiking as he stepped further away.

 Chromedome only laughed harder. “Very funny Rewind… You always made me smile…” He purred, his visor darkening. “…Let’s… get back together… forever…!”

 The larger mech pounced, pinning the white minibot to the ground. Tailgate screamed as his arms and legs were forced to the ground, the mutilated mech straddling his hips. “No! Stop!” He cried, wriggling as much as he could to get away.

 “I know I promised not to inject anymore…” Chromedome continued, trailing his right hand up and down Tailgate’s chest, mnemosurgery needles catching on transformations seams and plating. “But… I want to be one… with you…” His hand was moving again, up the chest, over to the left shoulder and towards the back of the neck…

 “NO!” Tailgate howled, his hand grabbing for Chromedome’s, accidentally snapping off one of the needles. The yellow mech howled in pain, letting go of the other’s arms to hold his hands together. The minibot was frozen for a few, desperate moments before doing something he never thought he would do; he picked up the fallen needle and slashed at the other mech’s face, a thin scratch made on his right cheek.

 As Chromedome was distracted by the injury, Tailgate quickly yet clumsily wormed his way out of the mech’s grasp, getting to his pedes and running for it. He ran to his right, determined to get away from Chromedome.

 “Come back! Rewind!”

 That voice echoed from the room behind him, the sound only making Tailgate more determined to get away. He forced his legs to move faster, work harder, until they started to ache from the effort.  He thought of transforming, but he vaguely remembered the earlier warning, making him curse under his breath.

 Daring to peek over his shoulder, Tailgate noticed that Chromedome was running after him, a limp in his step and desperation in his visor. “Rewind! No! Wait, please!” He cried out.

 “I’m not Rewind!” Tailgate cried out, making a harsh left. He saw an open door and ran to it, hoping that he could get away for just a few moments. He gasped when he saw the room he ended up in. “Oh no… not good!”

 The only thing in the room was a dirty closet, something dribbling from the bottom of the doors. Tailgate remained frozen, looking quickly behind him when he heard Chromedome. Now or never!

 Without thinking, Tailgate threw open the closet door and jumped in, slamming the door behind him. He kept a hold on the door, trying to quiet this venting as he heard footsteps come into the room. The darkness of the closet was choking, as well as the rancid, foul stench of energon and, was that waste fluid he could detect? The smell choked the minibot, yet he tried his hardest not to make a single sound.

 He remained still as the footsteps came closer and Chromedome’s ragged venting became louder and louder…

 “Rewind…” He said, his voice soft and mournful. “Please… why did you… please… come back…”

 Tailgate stayed silent, his spark throbbing erratically as he heard the other mech outside start to walk away, the eerie sobbing starting again. The white mech remained where he was, waiting until the sounds finally faded and stayed away from one klik. Two. Three…

 He sighed and leaned back.

 Only for something to collapse on top of him.

 He screamed as the closet door swung open and whatever was in there landed on top of him. He grunted as he slammed into the floor and the item landing on him. He slowly crawled his way out from under it and looked back…

 It was a mech.

 The minibot gasped in horror when he saw the purple and black mech lying face-down, the back of his neck horribly mutilated and torn apart. He whimpered and steadily got onto his knees, pushing the body over so he could get a look at the mech’s face.

 If he recalled correctly, this was the mech who barged into his room with Drift and Swerve when Cyclonus was singing. Aquafend, was it? It didn’t fully matter, but it made Tailgate ask one simple question.

 “What happened here?”

* * *

 Meanwhile, another mech was lurking in the hallways, energon dripping from his claws and open mouth, smelling the air every once in a while. He grimaced as a particular scent registered with him.

 “Tailgaaaaate…” It growled.

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.K.A. The writer is a little too obsessed with crazy shit.
> 
> Also, Tailgate trying to be Ultra Magnus, but too much of a cutie to properly swear. :P
> 
> Song for this chapter: www.youtube.com/watch?v=gh80kB…
> 
> Also, thanks to this guy, who I used as a source for the translated lyrics. :P usinvaders.tumblr.com/post/105…


	3. Memoir

** Chapter 3  
Memoir **

> ‘The unsettled mind is at times an ally,  
> Leaving the senses to fend for themselves,  
> The senses collect undeniable data,  
> About beta carotene and theta waves,  
> The unsettled mind is at times an ally,  
> Leaving the senses to fend for themselves,  
> Then, the senses wanted the sky’  
> -‘Thetawaves’ by System of a Down

 Tailgate walked slowly through the halls of the Lost Light, his frame still shaking from his earlier encounter with Chromedome. What had happened? The same question bounced back and forth in his mind, each reverberation simply making him feel worse about what could have potentially happened.

 An idea sprung to mind.

 The radiation storm…

 Tailgate started to wonder if that had something to do with what had happened, but that only made him wonder what happened to everyone else and if they had been in a… similar state to Chromedome…

 He stepped on something.

 The minibot looked down and saw that underneath his pede was a datapad, dusty yet unbroken. He pulled his pede and knelt down, examining the device before picking it up. It looked fine enough, but it was another question if it was even working.

  _Creeeeeeak…_

 Tailgate whimpered at the sound, looking around before deciding to walk off.

* * *

 Sitting down, Tailgate clutched the datapad close to his chest. He had no idea whose room he was in, but that didn’t matter; as long as he could take a breather and not worry about someone murdering him, then that was okay.

 He propped his feet up onto the berth and turned on the device, three files appearing on the screen. Tailgate examined the titles – ‘ENTRY 1-4’, ‘ENTRY 5-8’, ‘ENTRY 9-13’ – hesitantly clicking on the first file.

 Another window popped up on screen, static scrambling it before it became clear. Nightbeat was seated in his room, the mess behind him almost mind-boggling in itself with notes and graphs pinned everywhere.

 ‘ _Okay… Day 1 since we came to this system._ ’ He began, looking forward with a grim expression. ‘ _We were hit by a powerful radiation storm and not only has the ship shut down, but half of the crew are dead. Melted, irradiated, or even full out disintegrated…_ ’

 Tailgate shivered at those words. Did he just hear that right…?

 Nightbeat continued. ‘ _Nautica, Perceptor and I are investigating the situation. Everyone else has been affected one way or another… Rodimus won’t stop shaking…_ ’ He sighed. ‘ _Ratchet’s been trying to keep everyone calm, Magnus hasn’t said a word… Cyclonus… where do I even begin with him?_ ’

 It was those last words that made the minibot freeze. What could have possibly happened to him? Cyclonus was strong and proud, was that changed because of whatever had happened?

 Before anything else could be clarified, the video cut off.

 Tailgate slowly stopped the video, turning off the datapad. “So… was that…?” He whispered to himself, trying to wrap his processor around the information.

 “They’re… d-d-dead…?” He whimpered, his hands shaking as he slowly put the datapad into his subspace. “Why… why…?”

 He sobbed, feeling his optics aching. Primus… why? Why did this have to happen?

 A dark, cold sensation started to spread through the minibot’s spark, one he had felt when he was stuck in the Mitteous Plateau, the weeks after his creations and even for the first months on the Lost Light…

 Loneliness.

 He felt alone.

 Was he always going to end this way?

 Alone no matter what?

* * *

 Tailgate trudged through the hallways, listening to the second entry on the datapad, which was blissfully shorter than the first.

 ‘ _Everyone’s been freaking out even more since the storm. Tensions are already running high between the survivors’ Nightbeat continued, scratching the side of his helm in thought. ‘Megatron, Rodimus and Rung have been trying to placate everyone, but so far… ugh. It’s not working._ ’

 The video cut off, Tailgate shutting off the datapad.

 The entirety of the situation still wasn’t sinking in for the white minibot, some of the pieces of the puzzle refusing to settle in place. The main question that pestered him was simply ‘why was he a survivor?’, along with others like ‘What happened to Chromedome?’, ‘Did Cyclonus survive?’

 Cyclonus.

 The mere thought of his conjunx endura sent a pang of grief and worry lance through Tailgate’s spark, making him pause in his steps. What DID happen? Was Cyclonus alive and somewhere on the ship? Did he die in the storm? Was he like Chromedome now?

 The possibilities swirled through his mind, a strained sob escaping from the minibot’s vocaliser. He forced himself to walk forwards, unable to stop the sobs from leaving his throat. “C-C-C-Cyclonus…!” He keened. “Where are you?”

 Tailgate glanced up for a brief moment, spotting a door, one that he was vaguely familiar with, albeit it being a place that he did not enter often.

 Swerve’s bar.

 The place made Tailgate think for a moment. What he wouldn’t give for a stiff drink right about now… well, he would just get a sweet energon spritzer, but that was beside the point.

 He padded towards the bar, gently pushing open the door. The inside was an absolute wreck; tables and chairs were strewn across the place and even some support beams were on the ground, holes in the ceiling where they should have been. But, for some odd reason, the bar itself was almost immaculate.

 He walked a little closer, his footsteps echoing off the walls. As he moved, he noticed that the counter was covered in sticky stains and a thin layer of dust. Tailgate pulled up a stool and sat.

 Sighing loudly, he put his helm down on the countertop, trying to keep his vents under control and stop himself from stressing out. He tapped his digits idly on the counter, trying to find a way to distract himself from everything that has been going on.

 He was so absorbed in his own mind that he didn’t realise someone was approaching until he heard someone cough hoarsely.

 “Hey, Tailgate!”

 The minibot looked up and couldn’t stop the squeal escaping him when he saw the mech in front of him, half of his face missing and an optic dangling out of the right socket.

 “Swerve!?”

* * *

 From the shadows, a mech crouched close to the ground, watching the white minibot in the bar. He heard the squeal, but did not make a single move.

 No.

 Now was not the time.

 He had to wait.

**TBC**


	4. Stoic ARmour

** Chapter 4  
Stoic Armour **

> ‘Start begging or you can scream big shot the choice is yours  
> Office carnage painted in bloody fright I'm a  
> Rabid rat; a salary sacrificed convertible  
> Paint my boss in tar and set him a light  
> Head down tails up define your purpose  
> ‘Til you bleed and you are raw to the bone  
> Head down tails up define your status  
> ‘Til your wallet is full and your soul is gone’  
> -‘Grind’ by Angelspit

“Woah, hey, Tailgate!”

The minibot was still trembling in his seat, even with Swerve’s reassurances. It was still incredibly disconcerting. The dangling optic was not helping in any way. “S-Swerve…?” He finally asked, his voice shaking as well. “What… happened?”

“What…? Oh, this!” The bartender chuckled, pointing to his half-mutilated face. “Well, I got in a fight. Well, Perceptor and Whirl had a gunfight and I kinda got in the way. So, Whirl brought out the ‘Shoomer’ and I got too close… didn’t take all of my face off, at least! I actually look like on those movie supervillains that Rewind used to show us? Y’remember? Two-Face?”

Tailgate slowly tuned out of Swerve’s chatter, trying not to look at that one dangly optic (He swore to Primus, he was not watching the damn thing). “Um…” He finally said. “Do you still have some energon spritzer?”

“And so, Skids was like… huh? Oh yeah, right. Comin’ up!” Swerve said, turning to pick up a half-full bottle of a pale lilac liquid. He took out an empty glass and a curly straw, pouring the liquid in and placing the straw. He slid the glass over to Tailgate. “Enjoy! It’s the kind you always order.”

The white minibot nodded and took off his faceplate, slowly sipping his drink. “Thanks Swerve.” He murmured. “It’s just… how did this all happen? It’s the Mitteous Plateau all over again.”

“Hey, look on the bright side.” The motormouth said. “At least you were out of it for three months instead of six million years.”

Tailgate shot Swerve a withering look, making the bartender frown.

“Okay, point taken. Shutting up now.”

Tailgate sighed and sipped his drink, a sense of sadness settling in his spark like a tired creature. Even knowing that someone he knew was definitely alive (even if ‘well’ might be a little ambiguous), it was still horrible to even begin to think about what could have happened to everyone else. Are they gone too? Did they end up like Chromedome? What did happen?

Swerve started to walk off, a slight limp in his step. But there was something that caught the   
white minibot’s attention. “Swerve…?” He began.

“Yeah?” He continued to walk, stopping to wipe the bar counter, only smearing the dirt more across the tacky surface.

“…What happened to your side?”

The bartender looked down, as if he had just noticed the rusted gash on his side. He smiled. “Oh yeah, just woke up one cycle like that.” He said with a shrug. “I mean, what’d the worst thing that can happen? Well, asides from not having a T-Cog anymore.”

The minibot didn’t respond as the bartender laughed, staring down at his drink in contemplation instead. He was amazed that Swerve could still laugh and joke through this mess, even when he was limping around with an obviously infected wound. Then again, Swerve did seem to handle whatever came his way pretty well, even if he was being pushed to the brink.

Tailgate finished his drink and hopped off of the stool, brushing himself off. “I think that I’ll go look around some more.” He announced. “I want to find out more about what happened here… maybe see if anyone else is alive.”

Swerve frowned. “I don’t think it’ll be that easy.” He admitted. “I mean… I saw some of the initial deaths when the storm happened… Primus, I can still see Brainstorm…”

That made Tailgate pause. He looked back to the metallurgist. “What happened to him?” He asked warily, afraid of what the answer may be.

Swerve coughed, his dangling optic quivering with the motion. “He was near where the initial impact was. I had just made it into a room and the door shut before I could get Brainstorm in with me. Just before it did close… He was knocked aside and the screaming…” He sighed, his tone suddenly far more solemn. “I mean, I got away alright, but Brainstorm… when I got the door open… His limbs had been blasted off… he was partially melted and he’d gone blind… He was crying out, but he kept on saying the same thing over and over again before he finally died…”

“What was it?” Tailgate asked, his spark trembling in his chest as he involuntarily imagined the gruesome scene.

“He was saying ‘Quark’.” Swerve explained. “And things like ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I’m coming’… I don’t know exactly what he meant.”

The bar fell silent, save for the venting of both minibots. The stillness remained in place before it was broken again.

“You can still go look.” Swerve finally said. “If you find anyone else who’s alright… tell them to come back here. This’ll be our safe house, okay?”

Tailgate nodded before he turned and left the bar.

* * *

Tailgate sighed as he kept on walking. He had turned on the datapad again and watched another video with Nightbeat.

_‘Now it’s Week 3 of being stranded and no progress has been made.’_ The mech said glumly, looking more dishevelled. _‘A lot of the survivors are growing restless… the power supply’s fading fast… but there’s something else that’s worrying me. It’s Rodimus… he’s got very deep lacerations on his arms and he keeps on talking about what happened was his fault… He’s losing his mind…’_

Tailgate paused in his movements, listening closely. How could Rodimus be behaving like that? From what the minibot had seen, he was vibrant and kept a hopeful outlook when the odds were stacked up against him.

_‘I should speak to Ultra Magnus, but he’s been missing for a while… same thing with Rung.’_ The video abruptly cut off, leaving the screen blank.

None of this was making sense. Where did the crew go? Who was dead and who was alive, if there was any? Tailgate’s mind settled back down to when he encountered Chromedome, his body trembling as he thought about the disastrous incident. Was there anyone else who had been left in such a state?

“No no no, stop!”

Tailgate jumped at the sound, his feet carrying him off instantly towards the source. That voice was familiar, but he couldn’t think of it straight away. He kept on running until he spotted the source of the screams.

“Getaway!”

The black and white mech looked up his position on the floor, his right legs bleeding heavily. “You have to help me Tailgate!” He cried out, trying to drag himself along the floor. “It’s Ultra Magnus! He’s trying to kill me!”

“What are you—“

Before anything else could be questioned, the floor shook as a loud bang reverberated throughout the tiny space. The noise became louder and louder, a shadow on the floor growing. The two mechs were quiet as the thing approached, Getaway trying to drag himself off of the floor and move closer to Tailgate.

The pursuer finally made itself known, a dull blue behemoth of a mech, face stone-cold and his steps measured and calculated. There was no mistake who it was.

“Ultra Magnus…?” Tailgate whimpered, taking a step back. “What are you doing?”

The blue mech didn’t say a word, instead continuing to walk forward. His footsteps were heavier than normal; making the ground seem like it would come apart from the force behind each step. His optics were blank as he stared at the two mechs.

He slowly raised his hand…

Pointed at them…

Opened his mouth…

Tailgate and Getaway covered their audials as a horrific noise came through, a rasping screaming roar. Droplets of black goo dripped forth from his lips, the scream not ceasing for the briefest moment.

“Tailgate, RUN!” Getaway screamed, pulling himself to his feet and grabbing hold of the minibot’s hand, darting off as fast he could. Tailgate squeaked, trying to keep up. The screaming soon stopped and he dared to glance over his shoulder, his spark racing even faster at the sight before him.

Ultra Magnus was moving again, his whole frame shaking as he ran after them.

Tailgate squealed and forced his legs to go faster, pulling on Getaway’s hand as they both tried to evade their pursuer. He stole a quick glance at the other mech’s leg, concern filling him as he saw that he was limping terribly. He kept on moving, fear forcing him further and further along.

“This way!” Getaway shouted, pulling Tailgate down to the right, his leg threatening to give from the sudden movement. “Just follow me!”

Tailgate nodded frantically as the two mechs ran, Ultra Magnus’ footsteps stamping behind them insistently. They ran as fast as they could, sparks pumping and vents shaking. They forced open a door and stopped.

“Scrap!” Getaway shouted. “Dead end!”

“What do we do?” Tailgate pleaded.

The taller mech rushed to the door and shut it, moving the file cabinet I front of. “Okay, think… think, think, think…”

The minibot breathed loudly and looked down, spotting a tile on the floor. It was slightly lighter than the rest and rested ajar. He moved over to it and pushed the tile away, smiling to himself when he saw a hole leading to a lower floor. “Getaway, over here!”

The mech looked over and laughed quietly. “You’re a genius Tailgate!” He shouted, running to the gap. “You really should be with the Wreckers, you know?”

Before the minibot could say a word, the mech leaped down the hole. He landed with a grunt and looked up to Tailgate, waving to him. “Come on!”

The minibot nodded and followed suit, grunting as soon as he hit the floor. He looked up to the ceiling, only for Getaway to grab hold of his hand again and pull him away. “Wait!”

The taller mech didn’t seem to take notice, focusing more on getting out of the new room and running again. He forced open the rusted door and pulled the minibot down the filthy corridor. Tailgate had to force himself to not retch when the stench of dust and rotten energon smacked against his olfactory sensors. He simply followed Getaway until the mech finally stopped.

They were both venting heavily, Getaway leaning against the wall and sliding down until he sat on the floor. Tailgate followed suit. The mech laughed. “That was… wow…” He gasped, exhaustion in his words. “That was intense…”

“No kidding.” Tailgate sighed in exhaustion, his body still humming from the excitement. “Thanks for helping me there.”

“Pah! That was all you, kiddo!” Getaway insisted, gently tapping his fist against Tailgate’s shoulder. “And for your effort, here’s a super special ‘bomp’.”

The minibot smiled underneath his mask, only for it to drop when he caught sight of Getaway’s leg again. “Wait, we need to get back to Swerve’s.” He suggested. “We need to fix your leg!”

“No, don’t worry about it.” He waved off the concern. “I’m not going to leave you alone and you need someone to protect since Cyclonus is—“

“Wait, Cyclonus?” The minibot perked at the mech’s name. He looked to Getaway with hope shining in his optics. “What happened to him? Is he okay?”

The mech fell silent, glancing down at the floor. That tiny gesture was enough to make Tailgate’s hopes sink and his fears rise. What had happened? “I’m sorry kid, but…”

Time slowed.

“Cyclonus is dead.”

Tailgate felt his spark shatter.

The pain radiated through his systems, his chest was on fire as he thought of his Conjunx Endura. He was dead? How could he have died? Why? Why did he leave him alone!?

Before he knew it, Tailgate was sobbing, with Getaway slowly wrapping his arms around him in a gentle hug.

* * *

The Mech peered around the corner, spotting the two mechs on the ground, anger spiking through him at the sight.

He couldn’t be trusted.

Only pain would follow.

With those thoughts, he growled and silently slinked away…

* * *

“Come in! Come in!”

Blaster cursed as the frequency failed to connect, his message refusing to be sent. He needed to do this as fast as he could and get help fast. Three months they had been stuck here… three agonizing, silent months where nothing good had come from it.

“This Blaster of the Lost Light! Requesting help immediately!” He called into the microphone again, hoping to get something through for once. “The ship has been damaged and stranded for three months, we request assistance! Please, we need help!”

So wrapped up was he in trying to get the message sent, he did not notice that tall figure looming behind him.

A dull blue behemoth of a mech, face stone-cold and his steps measured and calculated…

A large hand clamped down painfully on the communication officer’s shoulder, making the red mech turn and face his captor. His face blanched and optics widened in fear as one word fell from his lips.

“Magnus…”

The blue mech said nothing, his chest plating slowly open with a rusted screech and a disgusting squelch…

Blaster screamed.

**_TBC_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW. New Chapter. :D
> 
> Song for this chapter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkLebISc9A8
> 
> I'll admit to trying to go for the FNAF animatronic style for Mags, so that's what I had in mind doing this.


	5. Torment

** Chapter 5  
Torment **

> In my shoes  
> A walking sleep  
> And my youth  
> I pray to keep  
> Heaven send  
> Hell away  
> No one sings  
> Like you anymore  
> -‘Black Hole Sun’ by Soundgarden

_Tailgate and Cyclonus lay in their berth together, hands intertwined with each other. Cyclonus’ own hand dwarfed Tailgate’s but proved incredibly warming for the minibot in question. They had just concluded a very passionate round of love-making, their focus merely to help the other feel their own feelings towards each other._

_Tailgate huddled closer to the flier, pressing his faceplates against his love’s broad chest. “That was amazing… thank you…”_

_Cyclonus chuckled, a low brief rumbling sound. “You don’t need to say thank you every time we do this.” He gently chastised._

_The minibot blushed faintly. “Oh, okay… sorry.”_

_“You needn’t apologise either.”_

_Before Tailgate could say anything further, the flier gently pressed a kiss on his partner’s lips and squeezed his hand. “All that matters is that you’re here with me.” He rumbled gently. “And I with you.”_

_Tailgate smiled, looking up to the older, taller mech. “I love you so much…”_

* * *

Dead?

Cyclonus is dead?

That…

That couldn’t be true!

No!

Tailgate’s body shook with despair as Getaway held him close, sobs leaving him fast and hard. None of this was making sense. Cyclonus was too strong of a mech to even get a scratch on him, let alone killed! Who could have done such a thing!?

“It was Magnus.” Getaway finally spoke, as if sensing what Tailgate wanted to know. “We were running from him and… I tried to save him, but Cyclonus… I couldn’t get to him in time…”

The minibot didn’t reply, instead tightening his hold on the other mech. This was a lot to take in… he felt like he was slowly sinking and the currents were picking up; hold on or be swept away…

He sobbed. “Getaway…” He whimpered. “I… it hurts…”

The taller mech nodded solemnly and with no effort, lifted the minibot up into his arms and slowly stood. “C’mon. We’ll find somewhere to just sit and rest for a bit.” He suggested, starting to walk away without waiting for Tailgate’s answer.

* * *

_“Lower yourself. Tighten your grip.”_

_Tailgate nodded, crouching down further and holding firmly onto the short sword in his hands. He was still a little surprised that Cyclonus had offered to teach him some basic sword fighting, but he leapt at the chance as soon as it appeared. He did learn some Old Cybertronian from him in the past and he enjoyed that immensely, he supposed that Cyclonus merely wanted to help him learn some more skills._

_The flier nodded, kneeling down and gently resting his hands on the minibot’s shoulder and elbow. “Very good. You just need to be able to maintain this stance while in battle.” He explained. “Keep your balance, but you need to be aware of both yourself and what is going on around you.”_

_Tailgate nodded. “Right!”_

_Cyclonus chuckled standing up and walking away to stand in front of the minibot. He drew his own sword and held it in both hands. “Now… pretend that I am your mirror image…” He said. “And follow my movements as closely as possible.”_

_The minibot nodded, preparing himself for the rest of the lesson._

* * *

Tailgate laid curled up on the dusty berth, facing the wall. He had not said a word since Getaway had placed him here, nor had he protested to his movements. He simply remained still as he listened to Getaway moving around behind him. He simply lay there, trying to form his own bubble to seal off his despair and himself from the rest of the world.

Who cared anyway?

Cyclonus was gone, so he had no reason to continue, now did he?

Tailgate instead shut his optics, ignoring Getaway’s questions into his wellbeing or what was on his processor. The minibot was surprised he hadn’t figured out that he didn’t want to say a single word; so why continue pestering him?

“…Tailgate…”

The minibot did not respond.

Didn’t flinch when the other mech put a hand on his shoulder.

“I know that what’s just happened is a lot to take in.” Getaway spoke, his voice dripping with sympathy. “Just… try and get some rest and we’ll think about a course of action soon.”

Tailgate remained silent, instead forcing his body to shut down for recharge.

Maybe things will be less painful in his dreams…

* * *  
_Tailgate whimpered as he clung to Cyclonus’ arm, watching the movie with panic going through his spark. It was movie night and the ‘entertainment’ (which Tailgate was hesitant to use since all it had done so far was scare the daylights out of him) for the event was some Earth movie called ‘Silence of the Lambs’. He didn’t really get it, but all he knew was that the crazy doctor guy really should be in that cage…_

_It seemed he was the only one with that feeling as Swerve and Rodimus were watching avidly, Skids and Getaway were cramming snacks into their mouths, and Whirl was leaning back in his seat looking bored out of his processor._

_Tailgate held onto the jet’s arm tighter, his frame trembling as he watched the scene unfold before him. “Don’t go near him…” He murmured as the security guards approached the crazy doctor’s cage. “Dooon’t do it…”_

_Then the crazy doctor lunged forward, biting the guard’s face._

_Tailgate squealed and hid his face in Cyclonus’ chest, the music and grisly sounds doing nothing to ease his panic. He winced when he heard what sounded like someone being beaten over and over…_

_Something warm wrapped around him._

_The minibot looked up, Cyclonus’ expression stoic as usual… but his arms were wrapped tightly around the smaller mech. Red optics glanced down at his partner, his lips quirking the tiniest bit._

_Tailgate relaxed, even as the movie progressed and got more and more intense as the doctor escaped his prison. He always enjoyed it when Cyclonus held him like this during Movie night and all of the implications the hold contained for him. If it was a sad movie they were watching, it was soothing. If it was a romantic movie, it was a reminder. If it was a scary movie, it was protective._

_But every last one made Tailgate feel safe._

_Feel loved._

* * *

Tailgate felt something tickle his hip.

He muttered quietly and rolled onto his back, trying to get himself back into recharge.

The tickling progressed to his chest and abdomen.

He whined quietly, squirming as he tried to sleep. “Go away…” He murmured quietly, shaking his head slightly.

The sensation slowly stopped, but Tailgate couldn’t help but feel something sitting on his chest, right where his spark was… “Lemme recharge…”

“Nah. Wake up, you lazy munchkin!”

The minibot slowly opened his optics at the response, his whole body suddenly jolting awake and staring widely at what was on his chest.

It was an organic girl, grey-blue ‘hair’ done in pigtails and wearing a denim skirt, a blue shirt, striped stockings and combat boots. But it was three things that stood out the most. One, the eye patch covering her left eye. Two, the golden right eye. And three, the machine guns holstered into her spike belt.

That must mean that this girl… she’s…!

“Whirl?” Tailgate questioned, confusion filling him.

‘Whirl’ nodded, smirking widely. “That’s right Pipsqueak.” She said. “Got into a bit of scrap and I thought that maybe my holomatter avatar would give me some good chances at movin’ around. So here I am.”

The minibot remained still, not wanting to dislodge the other from his chest. “But… what are you doing here?”

“Well, I kinda heard about Magnus goin’ on a rampage and that he was going after Getaway and you, so I went around to take a look.” ‘Whirl’ simply looked bored as she spoke. “Oh yeah, so you’re here, Getaway’s gone out for the moment and Blaster’s kind of sort of dead. That sucks.”

Tailgate blinked at all the information, trying to take all of it in. “Uh… that ‘scrap’ you were talking about earlier?” He began. “Did it involve the ‘Shoomer’?”

“How did you know?”

He blinked again. Well, at least he had a bit of a better idea of what was going on. “Never mind that, but I need your help!”

“Sure, peanut.” ‘Whirl’ shrugged as she spoke. “What did ya need?”

“I need you to help me. I wanna know what happened here.” He explained. “But, I want to help you as well, so please tell me!”

Before ‘Whirl’ could say anything in return, there was a click. The door to the room was slowly creaking open. “I gotta go.” She blurted out, only to sudden fade away in a shimmer of blue light.

Tailgate was about to call out for Whirl again, but the words died in his throat when Getaway entered the room. There was something ominous around him… like he had something in mind that was horrible, terrifying or disastrous. The minibot shivered with unease, not knowing what to do.

“Hey there little guy.” The taller mech greeted, his voice unusually chipper. “How did you recharge?”

Tailgate did not answer, his throat slowly constricting.

* * *

_Tailgate wasn’t sure what to expect when he approached his shared hab-suite. He was simply watching an ‘anime’ called ‘Cowboy Bebop’ with Rewind and Swerve when he received a message from Cyclonus, asking him to come back to their hab-suite._

_He didn’t know why the former Decepticon would have called him to their room nor did that stop him from worrying about what was potentially going on. Was he angry? Was he leaving? Did he want Tailgate to leave? What did he want to say?_

_Before long, Tailgate made it to their shared hab-suite, a shaking hand raised to knock on the door. He took a few deep breaths before his gently tapped the door. Panic gripped him once again and he considered tucking tail and running._

_The door slid open._

_The minibot entered the room, taking in everything. The lights were dimmed slightly and everything had been meticulously tidied and placed in their respective spots. A song was playing gently in the background and it took him a few moments to recognise it as ‘The Power of Love’; Cyclonus did have a fondness for that song._

_Speaking of whom, the mech was stood in the middle of the room, looking his usual stern self, but… he seemed… nervous? “Cyclonus?” Tailgate asked. “What is it?”_

_The jet inhale deeply before he spoke. “I have something I wanted to ask of you, but I wasn’t sure how to let you know of this.” He said, looking to the side for the briefest moment before looking back. “I cannot think of a delicate way to put this. Tact in such matters has never been my forte.”_

_Before the minibot could dare ask what was going on, his spark fluttered as the taller mech bent down to one knee. Cyclonus held a hand out. “I love you Tailgate. I care for you deeply. I know it does not seem that way most days, but is true.” He said as evenly as he could, although Tailgate noticed a quiver in his voice (that never happened!) now and then. “Tailgate… will you… be my Conjunx Endura?”_

_That question made time come to a standstill, Tailgate’s spark freezing but fluttering wildly. Did he really hear right? Did Cyclonus just…?_

_A sob escaped from him and he launched himself at the mech, wrapping his arms around his neck in a tight hug. “Yes! Of course!” He cried out. “I will! I love you Cyclonus!”_

_Unbeknownst to him, as Cyclonus returned the hug, he smiled warmly and affectionately._

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bad timing to upload this, huh? Anyway, happy Thanksgiving guys!
> 
> Song for this chapter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mbBbFH9fAg


End file.
